


Alex Danvers' Leap of Faith

by MA477LL



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-03-03 12:54:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13341681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MA477LL/pseuds/MA477LL
Summary: Maggie is transferred back to National City after spending years in Gotham. Maybe it is a chance for Alex to right past wrongs.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fix-it story, but it takes a bit to work itself out. Alex and Maggie have to talk things through.

“Runaway bride,” he mumbled, “incoming.”

Maggie nonchalantly stepped on his foot. “Shut up, Jackson.”

Then, she pivoted on her heel and turned, putting some distance between them.

Alex Danvers walked confidently towards them. A second agent, obviously DEO too, trailed a few steps behind. Maggie could see a black van at the far side of the parking lot, behind the police line; towards the south and the river. Two agents stood by it, dressed all in black. She rolled her eyes behind her sunglasses. _Up-tight feds and their flair for the dramatic_. She nodded towards the van; sure that Winn was watching through some hidden camera.

Maggie took her time to look at Alex approach. She still had that confident swagger Maggie was so drawn to all those years back. She took in the shape of her, her gait, her sharp angles and soft curves, her pale skin and full figure. She allowed herself to sink in the raw attraction she still felt for her. The undercurrent of that gravitational force that had pulled them together just as it had pushed them apart still there: keeping them in each other’s orbits.

Not everything was the same, though. Something glaringly obvious was missing. Despite the van, the other agents, the number of curious onlookers surrounding the scene, Maggie felt Alex’s loneliness: the absence of Supergirl almost a presence.

Walking in this sun without her sister trailing behind, Alex was a woman without shadow.

“Danvers,” she drawled, “it’s been a while.” Her voice sounded strong and confident, the sharp edge of sarcasm cutting any pretence that Alex Danvers was _not_ trying to interfere in her every investigation lately. She also nodded to the woman that accompanied her. Maggie had seen her before at the DEO offices, but her name eluded her just then.

Maggie took her sunglasses off and placed them on the crown of her head. It was a deep-seated habit; friend or foe, she looked at people in the eye. Faced whatever cards life dealt her. No subterfuges. It had been a long time since she last hid from anything. In that, she had Alex to thank.

 _Brave is just another word for stupid_ , she thought ruefully.

But this was not just anyone, so she could cut herself some slack. It had been over five years since Alex broke off their engagement and put an end to their relationship, but Maggie would not lie to herself and say that Alex could not get a reaction out of her, even after all that time.

“What’s with the reinforcements?” Maggie asked as she saw a second black van join the first. She pointed towards the car they had been searching, “we’ve got this covered,” she disclosed, in a peace offering of sorts, “we got here a bit ago, been talking to the locals, not yet sure if this is relevant to you guys. Looks like a robbery gone bad so far.”

It was _their_ crime scene. They got there first, but Maggie would very much like to get the DEO on her side. She had seen first-hand the technology they had access to, their databases and intelligence. It would be in all their interests to work together.

She felt Jackson move from behind her, brushing against her arm and casting a shadow over both Alex and herself. He was built like a line-backer. Damn kid did not realize he was a giant. He was also _the_ best partner Maggie had ever had. High praise from her. She usually disliked having partners, but not Jackson. She even told him her sob story with Alex back when they were in Gotham, so when their unit was transferred, Maggie was grateful she could lean a bit on him and his silly humour. Truth was, when she first saw Alex Danvers in a crime scene, she reacted badly.

She had not expected to slip so fast, so unceremoniously, down the slope of missed opportunities and lost chances.

She hit bottom rock at the _never good enough_ stop.

There were no connecting buses from that stop. Just the kind that took you all the way back to square one.

 _Story of my life_ , she thought.

But it had hurt. It _hurt_. The realization that she had not moved on, that she was healed, but with scars like water-eroded clefts. That so many layers of skin were peeled off as she sunk, her bones were showing. _Water can only flow downhill._

“Captain Sawyer,” Alex greeted Maggie formally. There was caution but also, a bit of mischief in her eyes, with Alex becoming increasingly comfortable around her. “I’m afraid you know this crime scene is out of your jurisdiction.” Alex said and nodded towards the other woman. Vasquez, _that was her name_ , gesturing to encompass the car Jackson and Maggie were examining, “take over, please.”

Vasquez made eye contact with Maggie, recognition flashing quickly in her eyes, and obediently followed Alex’s orders. “On it.”

Maggie shook her head and turned to watch Vasquez. Alex took the opportunity to give her a throughout once-over.

Maggie looked even more beautiful now than when she was younger, if that was even possible.

Of course, Maggie in her tight jeans and leather jackets had always been Alex Danvers’ weakness.

“Right,” Maggie sighed. “Jackson, go pick up our stuff and wait for me in the car?”

“Sure thing,” he nodded towards Alex. “Special Agent-in Charge Danvers,” he gave her a charming smile, “as usual, the pleasure is all yours.”

Alex did not acknowledge him in any way.

She did not like him on principle.

She did not like _anyone_ who had a tether into Maggie’s life. She understood it was childish and below her dignity, but also, that she would be jealous if Jackson were a woman. And there was the one exception to Alex’s scientific approach: where Maggie was concerned, knowing meant little. It did not change how she felt.

“Maybe you should tell him I’m not FBI,” Alex took a small step closer, invading Maggie’s space.

“Oh, he knows,” Maggie smirked. “He’s just an ass.”

They regarded each other. Alex felt in her bones that there was _something_ she could still salvage between them. She was not sure what that something was, but this? The ability to just _be_? Alex could hear the silence only when she was with Maggie. It was not something she had been able to find elsewhere. It settled her mind. Of course, it had been both their private haven and their doom: They should have talked _more_.

“Are you taking all my cases to get my attention, Danvers?”

“Who? Me?” Alex waved her hand in the air and coloured prettily.

From bad-ass DEO agent to awkward fumbling 35-year-old woman in the span of a second.

Maggie blinked. Alex was beautiful. It _must_ be one of her tita Rosa’s curses that she found herself so charmed by this woman’s awkwardness. She had even jokingly asked her tita, once she had managed to move on enough to joke about her failed relationship with Alex.

_“I just cannot forget her…” she had laughed over the phone trying to lighten up the mood, “did you put one of your curses on us?”_

_A long silence had followed the question. A rustling of pages._

_“Tita?”_

_“I was just checking my lista, how do you call it?_ _Mal de ojo?_ _The evil eye list?”_

 _“You have a list,” Maggie asked incredulously. “And you_ had _to check that I_ wasn’t _in it?”_

_“Don’t be ridiculous, Marga. The mal de ojo is a serious thing, of course I keep a record.”_

Maggie smiled as she remembered. Then, she turned to look at Jackson, intend to distract herself from what Alex Danvers’ blushing was doing to her. He was packing up their things and talking good-naturedly with Vasquez. “We can work the case together, NCPD and the DEO.”

“We cannot,” Alex answered, hands on hips, all friendliness forgotten. “There are signs of dangerous alien activity, and you know NCPD is ill prepared to deal with it.”

Maggie bristled at that. Alex Danvers had changed, _was_ changed. Not outwardly, but she had acquired a harder edge. She had been blocking all possible collaborations between NCPD and the DEO since Maggie first arrived back three months ago.

Maybe she should have stayed in Gotham. It was a decision Maggie was still 50-50 about. Life there had been grey, painless. Dull. But crime had gone through the roof in National City once word got out that Supergirl was no longer around to stop criminals.

Maggie and her unit were needed _there_.

And Alex Danvers had better allow her to do her job.

It was _all_ Maggie had left.  

“Fine,” Maggie gritted out. She stepped in, unhappy not to have chosen a higher heel that morning, their height difference more obvious as she drew closer. “But this is the last time I step back from an investigation, Danvers,” she moved her hand, signalling between them. “We’ve unfinished business, you and I,” she nodded, “I _know_ , but next time, we’re playing this differently. Courtesy time is over.”

“You do what you feel you need to do,” Alex said, but her stance clearly signalled that she was up for battle, would probably relish it. “Now, if you don’t mind. We’ve got work to do here.”

“Yeah, ok.” Maggie said and took a step back. “I’m sure I’ll see you around, Danvers.”

She walked slowly towards their car, where Jackson was already waiting, sitting on the passenger side, eating a donut. _When did he even buy it?_

“Could you be more of a stereotype?” She asked him as she started the car and drove them out of the parking lot.

He shrugged his large shoulders and pointed back with his thumb, “Julia Roberts over there, she was checking out your booty, Sawyer.”

“She was _not_.”

“Uh-huh. Whatever, but you gotta talk to her. She’s kicking our asses here, taking all of our cases from under our noses. I sense she’s still pissed at you,” he said between bites. “Are you sure _she_ dumped _you_?”

Maggie reached up for her sunglasses and put them back on.

“Pretty sure.”

xxx

That night, Maggie left the office early. “Need to water the bonsais,” she told Jackson.

“Right,” he rolled his eyes. “Is that code for taking that girl in accounting out on a date?”

She grabbed her jacket and keys and waved her fingers at him. “So not your business.”

She rode her bike to her apartment taking the longest possible route. It was a clear evening, without clouds. The sky progressively painted in shades of orange and blue as the sun went down behind the mountains that framed the city. It was strange, to feel herself noticing small things like that again.

The years away, in Gotham, had just _passed_. Maggie understood that then.

She could not recall anything of note from the previous five years. No friends, no dinners, no moments stood out. She _had_ been there, she had dates, sex, even girlfriends, but it was all a fog. There were no feelings attached to the memories. She felt nothing even when she looked at the pictures stored in her phone. She was smiling in many of them. They were part of a documentary about someone else’s life. Shadows reflected against a wall.

Being back to National City, she felt that she could have a full life. Maybe find a lover, a partner. Look for a nicer apartment. Convince Jackson to go with her to a few baseball games that summer.

Mainly, Maggie felt ready to acknowledge what she has known for years: that afternoon, when they had danced and loved, and said goodbye, Alex Danvers _had_ ruined her life.

xxx

Her apartment was freezing when she entered it. The large window by the kitchen was open, letting in the cold night air. She would never leave it open. Not in that neighbourhood. She reached for her gun before the door was completely open.

“Maggie, wait!”

She did not lower the gun, but she reached for the light switch, blinking to adjust her eyesight as the light chased away the darkness.

“Kara.”

Kara Danvers was standing by her fridge. Very obviously caught in the process of preparing herself a rather large snack.

 _In the dark_.

Of course, Supergirl had night vision and day and night were social constructs to her, but still. The Kara that Maggie had known cared about human customs too much to ever use her powers in that manner.

They stared at each other.

Kara looked older. Not physically. She was still the prettiest girl Maggie had ever seen, with her blonde, all-American looks, high ponytail and silly glasses. But there was a wariness to her expression that Maggie did not recognize. It was not one of the many faces she had seen Kara wear in that year when they were almost sisters-in-law.

Maggie lowered the gun, placing it in the safe by the entry. She closed the door and took off her jacket, hanging it carefully.

“I thought you’ve left National City.”

Kara shook her head. “I only went back into civil life.” She turned towards her half-prepared mountain of a sandwich, at least six layers tall, “do you mind? I haven’t eaten yet today,” and Maggie could see a slight pout forming. “I’m making enough for the two of us.”

It relaxed Maggie, that bit of familiarity.

“Yes, of course,” she nodded. “I’m happy to see you.”

It was true. Maggie had missed Kara Danvers. And Winn, and James, and J’onn. The life Alex had brought with her. Her ready-made family of wonderful people Maggie could have loved as her own kin. She knew Kara was never in her corner, but not because of any dislike between them. Kara had always been so firmly in Alex’s corner, she could not have hoped to even imagine there were other sides to take. Life for her was a clearly defined line splitting all happenings into a black-and-white divide between Alex’s side and all other sides.

Kara gave her one of her thousand-kw smiles, full of white teeth, “I missed you too, Maggie.” And Maggie believed her. It was Kara’s magic, a sincerity that lighted dark corners of the soul. “I wasn’t sure at first, you know, because I'm so used to listening for Alex’s heart just as a background, so it took me a while to realize something was different. I couldn’t figure it out, it’s been so long…,” she said around a large bite, “but of course it was you.”

Maggie was not sure what Kara meant, and she did _not_ want to know.

She still loved Alex Danvers, that was something she was willing to admit to herself. There was no point in denying it, as there was no point in wondering whether Alex loved her back. It was inconsequential: lack of love was never their problem.

She had managed to build herself back up, without leaning on the Danvers’ sisters, and so she asked the second-best thing she wanted to know.

“What happened, Kara? Why are you not out there with Alex?”

Kara scrunched up her face. The crinkle between her eyes becoming prominent. “I hesitated.”

“You hesitated?”

“I cannot be Supergirl if _I don’t know_.”

Maggie tilted her head, listening. Not sure if she understood.

“Out there, in the streets, I always _knew_. Always. Right from wrong. It was so easy,” she smiled wishfully. “I know you didn’t agree with that vision sometimes, but in my core, I was so sure.”

Maggie smiled too at the memory, she had told Kara a few truths about her ‘ _visions_.’

Kara pushed a plate with a sandwich towards Maggie as she went on, “but Alex, she lost her balance, you know, when you-, when she-,” she waved her hands vaguely in the air, but there were no easy words for what Maggie and Alex meant to each other, what they did to each other.

Kara just sighted, “and she tried so hard, for years, but she couldn’t-, she-,” she shrugged. “It didn’t work without you. I think she just missed you too much and didn’t know how to deal with it.”

Maggie took a bite of her sandwich. She heard what Kara was saying, and also, what she was not saying.

“You cannot be Supergirl without Alex.”

xxx

When Alex got to her apartment that night, she was exhausted. There had been an increasing amount of suspicious alien activity in the last few weeks, but there was nothing tangible, no clues as to whether there was an organized crime entity establishing its roots in National City, or just the general ill moral license that resulted from Supergirl’s absence.

On top of everything, she needed to look out for Maggie and her hulk-alike pal. It was more work, but somehow, Alex felt a sense of purpose that she had been sorely missing lately.

When she first saw Maggie after all those years in Gotham, Alex had felt like a drowning woman taking her first breath after being submerged.

She had been patiently watching herself sink all the way to the bottom. Resigned to her fate, but suddenly, _there was Maggie_. The Maggie of her sleepless nights: hands on narrow hips, tight jeans, dark hair wiping around in the wind.

It was a late morning on an otherwise unremarkable Thursday, and Maggie was standing in _her_ crime scene; possibly contaminating evidence.

Alex had felt herself gasp for breath.

_“Maggie?”_

_“Hey, Danvers,” and she had smiled. Like it had not been five years, a thousand lonely nights, enough missing memories to fill a lifetime._

_Alex had gaped. “How? When? Are you-,” She had rubbed her forehead and then, reached a hand towards Maggie, pulled it back before she could touch her._

_“I’m back to NCPD,” Maggie had explained, reaching with her hand to grab Alex’s. She had moved her thumb over Alex’s knuckles, caressing gently. Alex had felt goose bumps rise all over her body. “Gotta help you guys at the DEO with all the alien activity, it seems.”_

_“Yeah, right,” Alex had struggled to talk, too badly shaken. “You look great,” she had finally said. And blushed immediately. “No! I don’t mean-, I mean, of course you do, like always, but, no-,” Maggie had tilted her head, smiling patiently, “yeah, it’s good to see you, Maggie,” Alex had concluded softly._

_“You too,” and she had given Alex’s hand a final squeeze, before stepping back._

That was almost three months ago. Maggie had not touched her since. Still, _Maggie was in National City_ , Alex smiled as she headed for the fridge to get a beer.

She heard her phone ding as she opened the beer. It was a text message from an unknown number.

_Hey, Sawyer here. Let’s figure out jurisdiction once and for all. Coffee at the Starbucks on 17 th St. tomorrow at 5pm?_

Her heart jumped in her chest, bird in a cage. She struggled with herself to write back a reply, she wanted to write _YES!_ and _So good to have your new number_ , and _how did you get this number_ , and _can we make it dinner at my place instead?_ but ended up hitting delete and mumbling to herself “be less creepy, Alex.” Her fingers kept hitting the wrong keys, half numb from the nerves. In truth, it took her a few minutes to text back.

 _Of course, happy to meet up for coffee. See you at 5_.

She added a smile at the end and then deleted it. She did it four times with different smiling emojis, before sending it without any.

Maggie wanted to answer _It’s not a date_ , but she was not sure if she was warning Alex or herself, so finally, she decided not to text back.

xxx

Alex arrived early. Maggie was already there. She did not stand when Alex arrived, and so Alex halted in her approach, “hey, let me grab a coffee, do you want a refill?”

“Nah, I just got here,” Maggie gestured to her full cup.

Alex berated herself as she waited for her coffee. She had planned to arrive first and had been torturing herself all morning thinking of whether she would try to give Maggie a friendly kiss, or maybe even try to pull her into a quick hug when she arrived.

 _Count yourself lucky if she doesn’t kick you under the table_ , she thought morosely.

But Maggie smiled at her when she took a seat, and she did not move her leg away when Alex accidentally touched her knee under the table. Alex felt something like hope sparkle in her chest. It was a dangerous thing, hope. A spider that could cast its web without being noticed. She tried to snuff it out, before it could grow inside her, suffocate her from inside.

“You’ve been blocking my investigations, Danvers.” It was a statement of fact. “Why?”

Alex fidgeted with the sugar, breaking the package half over the table instead of in her coffee. “National City has changed,” she said. “It’s more dangerous now, without Ka-, without Supergirl.”

“I know that. It’s why my team was called back, but you _have_ to let us do our job.”

Alex opened her mouth to argue back, but Maggie continued. “You know me. I will _not_ toe the line any more, Danvers. If you keep pushing, I’ll find my own way.”

Alex knew she would. She also knew that Maggie’s way was through the back door. She would infiltrate herself, put herself in danger to find some dive bar that rogue aliens frequented, maybe find herself an alien girlfriend in the process. _If she doesn’t have one already_. Alex was not proud of herself that it was that last thought that turned the tables. “Fine. You are in.”

Maggie blinked, surprised by Alex’s quick capitulation, “me and Jackson. Full access to the DEO.”

“We’ll see about full access, but yes, I’ll get you both in.”

Maggie smiled, and took a drink from her coffee, satisfied. “I knew you’d see it my way.”

Alex laughed at that. “You bully.”

Maggie only winked, flashing her a wide smile, dimples showing.

She was stunning.

Alex smiled back, staring. Thanks to the large window behind her and the evening sun descending, Maggie was cast in light and shadow, and Alex could see the fine hairs on her soft skin, her long eyelashes, the little freckles around her mouth. There was no mistaking the heat in her eyes as she regarded Maggie.

Maggie raised her eyebrows, prompting Alex to talk.

“What happened to us, Maggie?”

Maggie blinked. Opened her mouth and closed it, “are you serious?”

“No, I know, I’m not asking you, I just-, I don’t know. It seems that what mattered so much then matters so little now.”

Maggie nodded, “we just wanted different things,” and for a moment, she was tempted to just leave it at that, to be the bigger person again, to take the conversation back to safer ground. In fact, she opened her mouth to say something about the upcoming baseball season, but she heard herself say what had been in her heart for so many years. “I wanted you, and you wanted children.”

Alex’s eyes opened wide. She looked to the side before looking again back at Maggie.

“I always wanted you.”

“I know you did,” Maggie said, “just not enough.”

Alex was quiet for a long time after that. She reached for Maggie’s hand, glad when Maggie allowed the contact. “It wasn’t like that, I wanted you too much, it burnt so brightly over everything else, I-, Maggie, being with you-, it was such a high,” she smiled sadly, “it got into my head, I felt like I could have done anything with you by my side, climb the Everest, discover the cure for cancer,” she shook her head, “have children.”

It was said in a wishful manner. Like having children was akin to those other things she listed: just a pipe dream.

“I just didn’t realize it was all because of you, I thought-, I don’t know what I thought,” she scrunched up her face, “I guess I didn’t think. You know how I jump into things sometimes.”

Maggie rolled her eyes, causing Alex to smile a bit. “I’d just come out and with you-, it was just so good,” she squeezed Maggie’s hand. “I didn’t see the parts for what they were, only the whole: I thought the main element was that I’d finally acknowledged to myself that I was a lesbian, that the biggest hurdle to making all my dreams come true was behind me, that this was the enzyme that would accelerate all other reactions, like dominos falling, but it wasn’t.” She shook her head, “it was _you_. You made everything possible, and once you were not there-,”

Maggie interrupted as she slipped her hand from Alex’s grasp, “I could’ve listened to this speech five, four, even three years ago,” Maggie said. “But now?”

“I know it’s too late,” Alex shook her head, “but it was also too late by the time I realized. You told me, Maggie. One strike, remember? You said I only got one and I used it,” she lifted one finger and then closed her fist. “I went to Gotham a few times,” she admitted. “Took the 7am flight.”

Maggie looked stricken at that, “you came to Gotham?”

Alex shrugged, “just to sit at the airport all day. I did it a couple of times. There’s some really good bars in arrivals, you know? The last time Kara had to come get me. Fly us both back.”

“But, why? Why didn’t you come meet me?”

“I was trying to respect your wishes. I’ve not been great at doing well by you, have I?”

It was an opening for Maggie to issue the accusation that had been building as she listened to Alex, “you broke my heart.”

“I broke _my_ heart!” Alex said loudly. There was a sudden drop in noise in the coffee shop around them. Alex lowered her voice, “and yours. Yours too, Maggie. I hate that I hurt you, that I hurt us both. I wanted to be a mother more than anything else,” she opened her arms as much as the seating allowed. “I just didn’t understand the states of nature, the probabilities involved,” she moved in the chair, leaning forward. “I misjudged the counterfactual.”

“I don’t know what that means.”

“It means that I was _wrong_.”

Maggie took a drink of her cup, only to notice she had no coffee left.

Alex could see her hand tremble as she placed the cup down. “Let me order you another.”

“Maybe we should get going? I think some air would do us good.”

Alex stared for a moment, then her shoulders dropped, “of course. I don’t want to push you, Maggie. I just wanted to apologize,” she mumbled. “Make it better.”

Maggie nodded. “I know.”

“So, let me?”

“Let you what?”

“Apologize.”

Maggie stood up, “not today.”

“Why not?”

“You wouldn’t like the answer.”

xxx


	2. Chapter 2

Maggie stood from the table and put her black leather jacket on. Alex could swear it was the one she was wearing when they first met. It suited her. She looked at Alex, “come on.”

“Wha-,” Alex said, confused. She thought Maggie was going to leave her at the coffee shop.

“Let’s go for a walk.”

“Ok,” she said, and then, “ok, yeah, ok,” and she drank all her coffee in one go, while trying to stand up and put on her jacket. The end result, of course, was a large coffee stain on her very best shirt. Maggie’s clean laugh at seeing her stellar display made Alex feel less mortified by her clumsiness.

The way that Maggie stared at her chest while she cleaned the stain as much as possible did not hurt Alex’s feelings either. She made a mental note to wear tighter tops in the future.

“I’m confused,” Alex confessed after they reached the river and started walking down the boulevard. “Are we ok?”

Maggie hesitated, “not entirely. Not yet, anyway. But I’ve listened to what you said,” she looked at Alex. “I’ll think about it, and we’ll talk again, ok? Maybe end this conversation?”

“Yeah, of course, sure, I mean, take your time.” Alex heard her rambling and grimaced. She deflated, feeling stupid, with her coffee stain and her over eagerness.

Maggie just walked alongside in silence.

It _was_ a beautiful autumn evening, with thousands of fallen leaves forming a colourful carpet of yellows and reds and browns. Maggie fished out a grey beanie and gloves. With them on, she looked toasty warm: too cute for words. Alex felt the chill in just her jacket and shirt. She had dressed to impress, rather than for the weather. She stuffed her hands in her front pockets, warding off a shiver. Maggie noticed and reached over, interlinking their arms. Alex felt an immediate warmth start where their arms were touching. It crawled up her arm all the way to her chest, hitting it with the force of one of Kara’s punches. She coughed to hide her gasp, and then, walked a bit taller.

Now that the dust had settled from the demolition of all her dreams, Maggie thought she may have sufficient distance to open this part of her heart again. At least, enough to forgive Alex for giving up on them. Maybe she could also forgive herself for accepting Alex’s rejection so easily. She knew that she had made Alex unhappy, in those last few weeks of their relationship. There were many signs that she chose not to acknowledge, refusing to actively witness the tragic unfolding of their life together. Maybe there was growing up still to do for Maggie too.

xxx

Alex did not disappoint. On Monday, both Maggie and Jackson got their accreditations at the DEO.

“J’onn,” Maggie hugged the big man to her, a lump forming in her throat, “it’s good to see you.”

“You too, Maggie. We missed you in National City,” he looked at Alex as he said that. “Glad to have you back on our side.”

“Tyrone L. Jackson, nice to meet you, sir,” He nodded at J’onn as he shook his hand. “Please call me Jackson.”

“Maggie!”

Maggie only heard the unnaturally high-pitched warning a second before Winn tackled her, pushing them into Alex, who had been standing immediately to her left.

Alex Danvers was not born an idiot.

She had _two_ PhDs.

She braced herself and hugged them to her, bringing Maggie right into her body. “Ooof.”

She had only wanted to feel Maggie against her, but she miscalculated. Maggie reached around her, trying to stop their momentum, and her face landed against Alex’s neck, pressing intimately close. When Maggie exhaled, warm breath against her sternum and soft hair against her cheek, Alex felt needles piercing her chest. She took a deep breath to try to calm down, but it only made things worse: Maggie’s scent filled her lungs. She was wearing a new perfume, something light and floral that did _not_ hide Maggie’s natural essence underneath it. Alex felt a dangerous beat start low in her stomach. Sending blood to places where she did _not_ need it.

She could not allow herself to desire Maggie like that. Not when Maggie was barely her friend.

“You idiot,” Alex hissed at Winn when they finally disentangled. She was blushing bright red, even her ears were pink. Maggie also looked flustered, but she stood marginally closer to her after that.

“Who are you,” Jackson asked Winn. “I like you.”

It made Winn blush almost as badly as Alex.

“This is Winn Schott,” Alex said as she pushed him, still annoyed, “resident genius.”

“Hi,” Winn said shyly, and Alex could swear that he batted his eyelashes at Jackson. She coughed to hide a sudden laugh: it ended up sounding like a muffled bark.

 _So much for looking smooth in front of Maggie_ , she thought with chagrin.

“Now that we’re done with the introductions,” J’onn said pointedly, “perhaps agent Danvers can get you up to speed on what we’ve been working on.”

“Of course,” Alex said and moved around the table to type on a keyboard, “we’ve detected a significant increase in illegal alien activity in the last year or so,” a hologram projected over the table showed a three-dimensional graph displaying a worrying upward trend. Maggie could see faces of criminals, details of alien races interlinking together, but no clear patterns. “The non-linearity starts on October, two years ago,” Alex pointed to a blue square in the graph. “That roughly coincides with the time when Supergirl went inactive. As you can see, at first, the increase was moderate, but it’s grown exponentially in recent months.”

“Could this be a new criminal organization making National City its base of operations?” Maggie asked. “We’ve got similar data, not as detailed, but we haven’t been able to tie it together yet, to isolate any common origins.”

“We’ve got all our units and informants trying to detect and infiltrate any such organizations, but so far, we haven’t been successful,” J’onn told them.

Winn moved around the table to show a different image, some kind of web of colourful clouds, “I’ve been using network theory to analyse all posts on social media, e-mails sent and received, messages on public and private forums, as well as text messages sent from all phones registered-,”

“Is that even legal?” Jackson interrupted.

“It _is_ , because Winn’s talking hypothetically,” Maggie answered. “And we haven’t heard about this.”

“We haven’t,” Jackson repeated after looking around the table.

Winn waited before continuing. _Maggie was one of them_. That went without saying, and if Maggie trusted Jackson, that gave him a lot of leeway with them, but they did not know him yet.

J’onn regarded Jackson carefully before nodding, “this one’s a good egg, Maggie.”

“I know.”

“Go on, Winn,” J’onn said.

“Ok, so I’ve looked into all of that, hypothetically,” he made two air quotes with his fingers, “and there’s nothing to suggest there’s a new criminal organization. If there is, it’s just too hush-hush at present for us to detect it. I mean, it may be a band that telepathically-,”

Alex elbowed him, “I guess the _reasonable_ alternative explanation is simply the absence of Supergirl: it must have attracted new criminals to National City,” she turned to Maggie. “Would you say similar patterns exist when it comes to non-alien crime?”

“We haven’t been looking into that, but I’ll find out.”

xxx

The gates of lost time opened: Maggie and Alex just clicked together effortlessly.

By the end of that day, they were working with the familiarity of the old days.

That night, Maggie was so wired, she could not sleep.

She could feel Alex Danvers start to fill all the empty stretches of her life, reclaiming all the spaces that had been theirs. Maggie could see the professional relationship that had been the precursor to friendship and _more_ , rise back to life so naturally, so untainted by their personal failures and disappointments, that she quaked in her resolve to keep Alex at arm’s length.

She even called her aunt.

_“Tita, what if I change my mind and it ends up being another mistake?”_

_“Then you change your mind, and you make another mistake,” her aunt said, never one to mince words. “There is nothing wrong with that. Don’t let the past haunt your future, Marga, dear. Don’t live in fear of what isn’t. Allow yourself every chance to be happy.”_

_“She hurt me so badly.”_

_“She did,” her aunt knew. “But she cannot change that now, can she?”_

xxx

That Friday, they ended up at a bar, having a beer together to unwind. It was late and Maggie restricted herself to just one drink.

She gave herself permission to drink it slowly.

“Just the one, Danvers. I need my beauty sleep.”

“Sure, let me buy, the craft beer here is really good,” she smiled and walked towards the bar before Maggie could protest. She decided to find them a place to sit. There were some tables to her right, but they felt too intimate. Maggie finally walked to a large table by the window that was mostly empty. She took over one of the corners; securing two high chairs for them.

Alex came back balancing two pints and a large plate of chips.

“Thanks.”

“Sure,” Alex smiled and offered her tankard to clink. She did not offer a toast. Maggie noticed that she took a small sip, apparently intend on making her drink last, too. “Do you like it?”

“It’s good,” Maggie confirmed.

They fell into a bit of an awkward silence after that: each thinking of a number of ways to start the conversation, just to remain silent.

“Do you come here often?” Maggie finally asked.

“Is that a pick-up line, Sawyer?”

“No!” and when Alex laughed, Maggie rolled her eyes, “dork.”

It served to break the ice and conversation flew easily after that. Alex moved her chair closer, so that at one point, her leg was pressed against Maggie’s and she was leaning precariously close as her drink was slowly consumed. Maggie did not pull back.

“Do you want another one?”

“We said just one.”

“True,” Alex saluted her, making Maggie smile fully, dimples and all. It went to Alex’s head, the beer, the company, the week of camaraderie, and as they were putting on their jackets, she asked the question that had been burning her stomach all night, “are you, ah, are you seeing anyone?”

Maggie stoped her motion, painfully aware of what Alex was asking and _why_. “Look-,”

“No, wait, I didn’t mean it like-,” but at Maggie’s knowing look she admitted, “ok, yeah, I meant it that way, but also, I want to get to know you again, Maggie. This week, working with you, there’s something still between us, can’t you feel it?” She grabbed Maggie’s elbow gently to turn her around, facing her more fully. She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, and then, without further prompting, shared the information that she wished Maggie had inquired about, “I’m single. Have been for almost two years now.”

Maggie said nothing. So Alex continued, in a lower voice, “no children.”

Maggie could see tears forming in Alex’s eyes.

“I’m sorry. I know how much that means to you.”

“That’s not why-, Maggie, it doesn’t.” She shook her head, “I just hate that I was _so_ stupid; that-, that I put that before you, before _us_.”

“You say that now,” Maggie said softly. She did not mean it as an accusation, but it was their true stumbling block: _she did not trust Alex_. If they gave each other a chance, Alex may fall back into her downward spiralling loop of motherhood dreams, disappointment in Maggie, and ultimately, unhappiness and pain for them both.

“No, no,” Alex’s whole body shook. “I could’ve had them, you know? I dated a woman with children for almost a year, I could’ve had children on my own too, but I chose not to.”

She grabbed Maggie’s hands, interlinking their fingers. “I choose not to.”

xxx

It wreaked Maggie’s peace. This Alex Danvers who seemed to have matured and learnt to prioritize what she wanted. She was distracted at work, asking Jackson to repeat himself over and over, because Alex was occupying her mind all the time.

“Where’s your head at, Sawyer?” he clucked his tongue in disapproval, “you’ve been in outer space this whole week. Your aunt Rosa told me you haven’t called her in days.”

“Why do you talk to my aunt.”

“Did you see that Chupacabra documentary on Channel 6 last night? It was freaking scary. And super cool. But mostly, scary. I called her so that we could watch it together.”

“Chupacabra. Really.” Maggie looked at the ceiling. “I should’ve never introduced you two.”

“You shouldn’t,” he admitted with a grin, “but seriously, you’ve been distracted this last week, you ok?”

Maggie waved her hand in dismissal, “yeah, yeah, of course. Just busy, you know.”

Jackson regarded her carefully. Maggie had been distracted, but also, smiling to herself at random intervals. She was… _daydreaming_. “Is it Erin Brokovich? She’s been around an awful lot recently, with her shiny red hair, big bambi eyes, and alabaster skin. Don’t think I haven’t noticed. Girl has it bad for you.”

Maggie shoulders slumped, “I think she wants us to get back together.”

“What do you want?”

“I don’t know.”

“Wow,” he said and moved up in his chair, “that’s quite the change of heart. I could’ve sworn that you were 150% sure you wanted nothing to do with her just a few months ago.”

“I know, but she’s changed, Jackson,” Maggie ran her hands over her hair in frustration. “Or maybe I’ve changed. Maybe I was fooling myself in Gotham, thinking this part of my life was over. Maybe it’s this damn city: everything is shinier, happier.”

“Yup, look at me. Ball of sunshine,” he winked. “By the way, is your friend Winn single, do you know?”

“Jackson.”

“Hey, he’s cute.”

She threw a bunch of papers at him and he laughed out loud, delighted to see Maggie like that.

xxx

She knocked on the door softly. It was only 10PM, but still, it was probably late for some of the neighbours, and she did not want Alex to get a bad rep.

Alex opened the door without asking who it was. She was in her pyjamas: wearing a red top that was too large on her and pants adorned with dancing pink elephants. Maggie thought she might not be wearing a bra. _Of course you had to notice_ , she rolled her eyes at herself.

It was the Alex Danvers that Maggie found harder to resist: out of her black ops uniform armour.

“Oh! Maggie, please come in,” Alex was obviously surprised, and Maggie hated herself for immediately disliking whoever Alex was expecting, opening her door so freely. It passed quickly, as Alex smiled brightly at her, delighted with her presence. At least she was until she looked down and blanched, “geez, you’ve caught me in my ugliest pyjamas. Don’t sick the fashion police on me, please,” she smoothed her top over her stomach, “I have nicer ones, you know.”

“I know,” Maggie acknowledged with a soft smile as she brushed Alex’s arm gently.

It made Alex blush, giving away her pleasure, placing her at a disadvantage with Maggie.

But Maggie needed all the leverage she could get. One side to Alex she discovered during their break-up was her ability to keep things from her. Alex was not the open book she presented herself to be. She was able to keep the juiciest of plot twists to herself.

“Do you want a beer? I’m waiting for a pizza that I just ordered, you’re welcome to half of it.”

“Like you would let me eat half.”

“Look, I told you, I’m used to having to fight Kara for pizza, it’s given me an accelerated metabolism,” Alex grinned as she patted her stomach.

“Accelerated metabolism,” Maggie laughed, “yeah, right, that’s just a fancy way of saying that you guys basically inhale your food.”

Alex laughed and went to the fridge to get two beers.

“You know, just a few weeks back, Kara came to my apartment and she pretty much ate all the food in my fridge.”

That stopped Alex, “you saw Kara?”

“Yeah, she came to welcome me back to National City, I guess.”

Alex nodded and smiled. “That’s-, that’s really good, Maggie,” she said as she finished opening the beers. She handed one to Maggie. Just then, the doorbell rang again, announcing the pizza delivery. “Finally!” Alex whined, “I’m so hungry.”

They were a couple of slices in when Alex remembered to ask, “why are you here? Did you need something? I forgot to ask. Not that I’m not delighted,” she immediately added, “please know you’re always welcome.”

“I-, I guess I’m ready to finish our conversation, you know, the one from Starbucks.”

Alex narrowed her eyes and then, opened then widely, “the end of the apology?”

“Let’s have it.”

Alex moved around the table, taking a seat next to Maggie, and earnestly said, “Maggie, I’m sorry.”

Maggie let out a laugh; Alex could be such a dork. Alex laughed too, and impulsively, reached to give Maggie a kiss on the cheek. _God_. She had missed the easy intimacy between them.

Maggie regarded her seriously and Alex moved even closer, standing from her chair and grabbing both of Maggie’s hands. Maggie hands were soft in hers, warm.

“No, seriously, I’m sorry that I spoiled the best thing that ever happened in my whole life. I cannot apologize enough, because I destroyed both of our futures, didn’t I.”

Maggie shook her head, “No, Alex-,”

“I-, I just keep thinking about what you said, you know?” Alex whispered, they were standing so close there was no need to raise her voice any higher, “about the full, happy life you’d imagined for us,” her voice broke, it hurt to talk of this, of all the firsts she gave up on. In her worst days, when she felt the need to punish herself, she would sit in her empty apartment and imagine the dozens of firsts she could have had with Maggie.

Her voice came out rough, choked, as she started to struggle to pull out words, “I was just standing too close to see it, to understand that what I had in front of me was-, that you-, that _you_ were my one in a lifetime chance.”

Her forehead touched Maggie’s. They had moved so close together, she could see a tear growing in Maggie’s dark eyelashes. It finally fell, smudging her eyeliner and leaving a dark trail until Alex reached to catch it with her thumb, leaving her hand on Maggie’s cheek. “I wanted to get a dog,” Alex laughed wetly. “I even went to the dog shelter, you know, but I couldn’t, I freaked out. It was one of our firsts, and I _couldn’t have it_ , not without you,” she took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. “Everything started to feel like I was cheating on our dreams. It paralysed me. I-,” she closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, “Maggie, I love you.” It was not what she had meant to say, but it was the foundation of who she was, the biggest truth she could share with Maggie.

Maggie let out a sob and shook her head.

“I’ve always loved you,” Alex repeated, the words scratching her throat as they came out, so profound were their hooks into her heart. “And I’m sorry. So sorry. Please forgive me.”

Maggie hugged Alex around the waist and nodded against her neck, allowing herself to enjoy the feel of Alex’s strong arms pulling her closer, caressing her hair and back.

They stood like that, in Alex’s kitchen, for a long time.

xxx

It cleared the air between them.

Settled the score.

Maggie loved Alex back, of course. But she did not know yet if she trusted her with her heart. And so they fell into an easy friendship. The understanding that they were attracted to each other and that Alex would gladly retake their relationship was there, but it did not feel like a burden. It was more like a corollary, a likely bottle neck down the road.

Everyone around Alex noticed the difference. Kara started showing again at their Friday bar crawls, also at the DEO. Always in her civilian outfits, but still, the sisters were obviously reconciled.

But familiarity bred all kinds of evils. And Alex Danvers was still the bravest, most risk-loving, hare-brained _idiot_ Maggie had ever met.

It was a sunny afternoon almost four months after Maggie and Alex had restarted their friendship, when they ran into a group of valeronians who had made themselves strong in the terrace of one of the skyscrapers downtown. They were holding some civilians hostage, and demanding a ton of cash and a helicopter to fly out of the city.

“Jackson, do you copy?” Maggie asked for the tenth time: no answer. She switched channels, “Jackson isn’t responding, they must have caught him, but I can’t see him.” Maggie was on the 56th floor of the building across from the one where the valeronians were. She had a perfect view into the terrace of the other building, “wait! I see Jackson, he seems fine, but it looks like his hands are tied behind his back, and-, my god, they’re dragging him to edge!”

What happened next took place inside two minutes.

Maggie aged a year in that time.

Alex Danvers burst into the terrace, guns blazing. She took out three of the valeronians before they even knew what hit them. She got to the other three just in time to stop them from throwing Jackson to the street below. They were both still precariously close to the edge, but safe.

Maggie watched first in relief and then, in horror, as Alex bent to check on Jackson and failed to see the last of the valeronians, who shot Alex in the chest with an alien gun of some kind, and grabbed onto Jackson’s leg, apparently still intend on throwing him off the building.

Alex was not out though, her vest having caught the round, but she struggled to get up, disoriented from the impact. As soon as she got her bearings, she did not hesitate: she threw herself at the valeronian. Maggie could only scream as they both toppled over the edge of the building, leaving Jackson unharmed, on the terrace.

“ALEX!”

It was the longest few seconds of Maggie’s life, until two things happened, almost simultaneously. First, she heard a loud cheer instead of the sickening crunch of a body as it hit the ground, dozens of floors below. Second, Supergirl flew into view carrying Alex in her arms, the unconscious valeronian hanging from one of her fingers. She landed on the terrace.

“Fuck,” Maggie whispered, and her legs gave out on her.

She sat on the floor until she managed to stop shaking. By the time she got to the ground, and all the way up to the terrace of the other building, Jackson had been untied and was looking more annoyed than hurt.

“Jackson! Are you ok?” Maggie jogged to him.

He stood up, shooing the paramedics away, “yeah, just a few scratches and bumps. Nothing serious.” Then, he turned to look at Supergirl and Alex. “Did you see that?”

Alex was hugging her sister, too stunned and happy to do anything beyond hang on to her.

Kara looked amazing in her Supergirl outfit. Maggie had not known how badly she had missed Supergirl until this moment. She could not stop smiling either.

“You’re back,” Alex said, smile splitting her face.

“So are you,” Kara laughed happily. Then, she spotted Maggie, standing next to Jackson, “hey, Maggie!” she waved her hand in a way that was both silly and endearing.

Jackson eyes bugged out, “you know Supergirl?”

But Maggie only had eyes for Alex.

Alex who was walking towards them, “you ok?” she asked Jackson gruffly. Maggie had to bite on a smile, remembering how Alex had confessed her knee-jerk reaction to Jackson and her initial dislike of him.

“Yeah, thanks for that, you guys saved my life.”

Alex nodded. “You can thank Supergirl,” she smiled brightly.

Maggie shook her head, “no, you-, what you did for Jackson. You could have died-,”

“Pffft,” she waved her hand, “he’s your family, Maggie,” then, she leaned closer, “I know when we-, when I-, I also took your family away. I wouldn’t let you lose another family.”

She squeezed Maggie’s shoulder, and before she could lose her nerve, reached to give Maggie a soft kiss right at the corner of her mouth. Maggie was too stunned to do more than lean into it. Later, she would berate herself for not turning her head to try to catch Alex’s lips. But it was over far too quickly and by the time Maggie opened her eyes, Alex was already walking towards her sister. Maggie could hear Alex squeal as Supergirl hugged her too tightly and whispered loudly “she called you Alex, when you fell. I heard it!”

Jackson gave a low whistle as he watched Alex go, “she’s got game, your Vivian.”

A laugh that was mostly a sob escaped Maggie, “she’s kind of the love of my life.”

Jackson nodded and reached around Maggie’s shoulders, pulling her to his side. She rubbed her face, trying to stop the tears. She punched him gently in the stomach. “And you are _not_ funny. She looks nothing like Julia Roberts.”

“I really liked her in that movie,” he said, “particularly the bit where she dropped that pasty idiot, and had a grand romance with her gal pal Kit.”

Maggie shook her head, still drying tears from her face. “That didn’t happen.”

“C’mon Sawyer, let’s go get a beer and think of better endings for Julia’s movies.”

xxx


	3. Chapter 3

News about the return of Supergirl spread like fire. That night, it was the main story in the evening news; Also, in the following day morning news. She featured prominently in pretty much every single newscast for over a week. Kara Danvers published a two-pages interview with the superhero on the weekend edition of the Daily Planet. But the attention was justified. National City had missed their superhero: everyone felt safer, happier. A dark cloud had been lifted off the city, now that Supergirl was back on the streets.

“What made you come back?” Alex asked over pot stickers and pizza. It was raining outside, and the sisters had been catching up on episodes of their favourite tv series all day.

“I never left.”

“That’s not true,” Alex stretched her leg over the coffee table, pushing her foot into Kara’s thigh.

“Move your stinky feet away from me,” Kara laughed, and reached to take the last pot sticker, eating it in one bite, “you remember Dr. Psycho and the Sanchez twins?”

Alex nodded. It had been terrible, to lose a child so young. “You couldn’t have saved both of them, Kara.”

“I know that now. But at the time, I wasn’t sure,” Kara felt a shiver run up her spine. She still dreamt about little Marta every now and then. She shook her head as she tried to dislodge the memory and kept talking: she had not said the most important thing yet, “you weren’t sure either, were you? You lost your faith in me, I could tell.”

Alex looked away, not trying to defend herself. “I’ve lost faith in everything and everyone by then, Kara. I-, I just couldn’t see right from wrong anymore. You know what terrible things I did to Dr. Psycho, after. When I lost-, I lost myself for a long time.”

Kara moved over to Alex’s couch and took a seat next to her, putting her arm over her shoulders and hugging her to her side. Alex let her head fall against Kara’s shoulder, raising her hand to take Kara’s, “so all it took was for me to jump off a building, eh?”

Kara laughed, “yeah, you _knew_ I was coming, didn’t you.”

Alex bopped her on the nose, “of course. You _are_ Supergirl, silly.”

Kara smiled widely, happy to finally feel the ground settle under them. They sat in silence for a while after that, finishing the pizza and just enjoying being together.

“Soooo,-“ Kara said. “Maggie.”

Alex took a cushion from the sofa and placed it over her own face, covering it, “Maggie,” she mumbled from under it.

Kara laughed and took the cushion, throwing it away. Alex would tell her everything in her own time, so Kara only grabbed her beer and reached to clink it with Alex’s, “To Maggie. To Supergirl. To the Danvers sisters.”

xxx

“Double or nothing.”

“Maggie, let’s just quit. I’m saying this with the utmost respect, but I think you play worse now than you did before,” she rubbed her chin in fake thought, “how’s that _even_ possible? It must be a medical anomaly… yet you seem to have all body parts correctly aligned.”

She let her eyes wander over Maggie’s body.

 _Yup, everything is exactly where it should be_ , Alex thought.

“Eyes up, Danvers.”

Alex moved around the pool table and grabbed her beer. She took a long sip, unrepentant. “I’ll let you buy the next round if-,”

“I’ll buy you dinner tomorrow,” Maggie interrupted.

Alex’s eyes bugged out, “dinner? as in, ah, you know, a date?”

Maggie approached Alex, placing her hand on hers, “a date.” The cue trembled as Maggie caressed Alex’s hand, making Alex blush, her body involuntarily moving closer.

Alex cleared her throat, “you’re on,” she said roughly and, then, proceeded to clean the table in an impressive display of ability.

“Alex,” Maggie whined, “were you letting me keep the score close out of pity?”

“Dinner, Sawyer,” Alex said firmly, raising a finger in the air, then she pointed at her body, “I’ll wear my sexiest dress and expect to be wooed.”

Maggie laughed, “wooed, huh?”

Alex nodded. She did not say how wooing her usually just took Maggie showing up.

xxx

Alex wore a dark dress that left Maggie breathless. In fact, her eyes dropped down to stare at Alex’s chest and lower so often that Alex mentally patted herself for choosing to show a bit more cleavage than usual.

It _was_ cheating a bit, playing to each other weaknesses so blatantly, but Alex felt she had worked hard enough for this chance.

By then, they had been friends for over six months and so conversation flowed easily. Maggie took her to a nice Italian restaurant, and they had linguine with a very fine red Rioja that made Alex drunk. They shared a delicious tiramisu for dessert. It was quiet, and romantic, and pretty much perfect. Alex had butterflies the size of bats battling for space in her stomach most of the night.

“I missed this,” Maggie said as she parked her car in front of Alex’s apartment. She turned to take Alex’s hand in hers, “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too, Maggie, so much,” she took a breath for courage, “come upstairs?”

Maggie smiled at her trade-mark bravery, eyes black in the low light of the car, “not tonight.” When Alex slumped in her seat she whispered, “next time.”

“Ok,” Alex perked back up immediately, “when?”

Maggie laughed out loud, charmed, “come here, you,” and gently took Alex’s face between her hands and finally, finally, kissed her.

Alex would not admit to it much later, when Maggie would tease her about it, but she moaned so loudly she made Maggie jump back. It was mortifying, except, Maggie kissed her again, laughing between kisses, “always so eager.” Alex would have been embarrassed, but _she was kissing Maggie Sawyer_ , and, to be quite honest, her dignity could take a hike.

For their next date, Alex invited Maggie to a baseball match. She spent most of it staring at Maggie instead of paying attention to the game. Maggie only smiled at her, and after the third inning, she put her hand so high up on Alex’s thigh, do not ask her who won in the end.

That time it was Alex who drove them, and it was Maggie who asked if she wanted to get a drink at her apartment.

Maybe she should have clarified it would be coffee, the following morning.

They started making out in the elevator, kissing and touching each other everywhere they could reach. As soon as they entered the apartment, Maggie pushed her against the door, pressing her hips into Alex’s, a hand reaching between their bodies. “Is this ok?” she asked.

Alex could only pant, “please.” She had been _ready_ since Maggie first put her hand on her thigh during the game. She was desperate for more.

Alex reached for Maggie’s belt, making quick work of it. She popped open the button of her pants and lowered the fly, getting her hand under Maggie’s underwear and cupping her. She caressed the fine hairs there, and at Maggie’s echoed “please”, parted her, slipping her fingers into her wetness. Maggie was so wet her fingers slid in easily, finding her engorged clitoris. “Alex,” Maggie sobbed, throwing her head back. She felt a pressure building between her legs, fast, pulsing, as she rocked her hips into Alex’s fingers, trying to feel more, to get Alex to move faster.

This part, Alex knew.

How fast it could go for Maggie sometimes.

She slid her hand out and carefully licked her fingers, “come on,” she urged Maggie and grabbed her hand, pulling her towards the bedroom. She loosened her own shirt and pants on the way. “Hurry,” Alex said as she stripped of her own clothing, and managed to almost strangle Maggie with her bra as she tried to help Maggie with clumsy hands, “ugh, sorry, I’m out of practice.”

Maggie laughed and dropped her bra into the pile of clothing they had created. Alex pushed Maggie to lie on her back on the bed, and fell on top of her, letting her thigh fill the space between Maggie’s open legs. She raised herself slightly, hands on both sides of Maggie, pushing her leg more firmly against her, starting to thrust slowly. She lowered herself to kiss Maggie, attempting to slow them down a bit, but they were too far gone. Maggie grabbed her buttocks, trying to put more pressure into her centre, moving her hips to get more friction.

“Shh,” Alex said between kisses, “Maggie.”

“Wha-,”

“Let me touch you.”

It slowed Maggie for a moment, as she reached up to caress Alex’s back, to touch her short hair, her neck, and cheeks and eyelids, “you’re so beautiful, Alex,” she whispered.

“So are you,” Alex said, as she started to kiss down Maggie’s neck and chest. She stopped to carefully fondle her breasts and bite her nipples gently. Maggie loved her there, but she finally groaned, “lower.”

And Alex complied, kissing her stomach, her hipbones. She placed herself between Maggie’s legs, reaching to carefully open her. She blew a warm breath over Maggie’s centre and followed it immediately with her lips and tongue, kissing Maggie where she most wanted to be touched. Maggie tried not to go off like a rocket at the first touch, but then, she gave up on the idea and decided she would try to last a bit longer the following time.

Or the time after that.

“Alex,” she moaned, “oh, god,” and when Alex captured her clit between her lips, tonguing her again and again, she came in Alex’s mouth with a sob.

She was still trembling from her orgasm when Alex moved back up her body, caressing and kissing her everywhere on her way up, until she reached all the way to kiss her lips tenderly, her closed eyelids and again, her mouth. Alex covered her mound with a warm hand, feeling the wetness and warmth there. Then, as she opened her mouth to kiss her more fully, Alex entered her slowly with two fingers, pushing her tongue into Maggie’s mouth. Maggie kissed her back sloppily, overcome. The second orgasm hit her even faster than the first, Maggie bucking on Alex’s fingers and shaking against her. 

xxx

Maggie was _not_ chipper. She informed Jackson in very clear terms.

She was also _not_ smiling dreamingly as she drank her coffee, or as she sat in the car during their stake-out that night. She was particularly _not_ smiling when Alex sent her a text message to arrange dinner with Kara and the gang later that weekend.

“Fine, Sawyer, you aren’t,” he threw his hands in the air. “Are you going to tell me what is it that you are NOT smiling about?” Jackson asked.

“Nope.”

“Well, as if I need you to tell me, it’s got to be about Shelby.”

“Who?”

Jackson touched his hand to his chest in mock horror, “you heathen, haven’t you seen Steel Magnolias? I don’t know why I bother with you.”

Maggie smiled at him, “yeah, ok,” she confirmed, “Alex and I went out last night. It went very well.”

“Oh, I see,” he touched her arm briefly. “I’m happy for you, Maggie.”

“You’re a good friend,” Maggie smiled, then she remembered, “what about you? Did you ask Winn out?”

Jackson winked at her. “He’s in the bag,” he said. 

xxx

It was a couple of months into their dating, when Maggie found them.

By then, Alex was sleeping at her apartment every weekend, but during the week, Maggie sometimes slept at Alex’s, since her apartment was closer to both their jobs.

Maggie was clearing out the bottom drawer of one of the two chests Alex had in her room. She wanted to place some of Alex’s jumpers down there, so that she could clear up enough space for some of her own things in the top drawer. She almost missed them, except she took a scarf out and one of the rings fell out as she was placing it on the floor, next to the jumpers.

She was too stunned to do anything, but Alex, having heard, quickly found it under the bed, where it had rolled to, and dig to extract the other one from the folds of the scarf.

“You kept them. All these years.”

“Of course.”

“But you transferred me the money, when you returned them.”

Alex only shrugged her shoulders. She guessed that was the one white lie Maggie was not going to fault her for. Maggie reached for her wedding ring, they were of similar sizes, but she would recognize _hers_ anywhere.

Alex closed her hand around the rings before Maggie could take them. “I wanted to keep them, to remind me of what I lost, but I want you to have them now, to keep them for us.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’d like it, if this time, whenever you feel ready, and I know that means it may never happen, but if-, if you-, I’d like it if you took the first step, Maggie, I feel like maybe I stumbled into all those big decisions, before,” she swallowed, “making all those awful mistakes along the way too, you know, and you just went along with it.”

Maggie felt tears rise, “all right.”

Alex took Maggie’s hand and put the rings on her palm, closing both of their hands around them, then, she pulled Maggie into her arms, hugging her tightly.

“You know we did everything except actually get married? The bride shower, the presents,” Alex laughed quietly, resting her cheek against Maggie’s soft hair, trying to shift the mood, “I felt quite lucky that your aunt Rosa could not come. If she had butted heads with my mom over who was the most controlling mother-figure, it could’ve been ugly.”

“You’re not getting out of listening to my tita tell you all about her mal de ojo curses.”

“So long as she doesn’t bring me a garlic collar.”

“You know she was only joking about that.”

“She so wasn’t,” Alex mumbled into Maggie’s hair.

xxx

Eventually, they got a new apartment by National City Park. If they wanted to start a new life together, they both wanted to meet in the middle. Avoid the mistakes they made last time around. It made them hesitant, and they second-guessed themselves sometimes, but it was worth it. There was nothing they cared about more than each other’s hearts.

The apartment faced south, like Alex’s prior apartment, and so they liked to enjoy the sun in the morning, as they had breakfast together. It had two rooms, a nice living area and a large terrace. Maggie told Supergirl she was welcome to visit any time, _using the front door_.

“This is a terrace for barbeques, and to sit in the sun. It’s _not_ a landing dock for superheros,” Maggie tried to appear stern, hands on hips. Alex just laughed and put her arm around Maggie’s shoulders, stealing a quick kiss. “You agreed to live with me, in this apartment, babe. Now, live with the consequences.”

“Do you like it? The apartment,” Maggie clarified.

“I could live anywhere with you.”

“Not what I asked.”

“I love it,” Alex smiled. “I love you.”

Maggie stood on her toes to kiss her sweetly, “I love you too.”

“Alex.”

“Hmm?”

“We should get a dog.”

“Yeah?” Alex smiled.

“Yeah.”

They went to the dog shelter and fell in love with the ugliest mongrel in the whole kernel, a mixed-breed collie that they named Gertrude.

Alex cried softly in Maggie’s arms that night when they went to bed. Gertrude was an important first. One she had wanted to have _for years_. Maggie hugged her tightly at first, but then, let her hands wander, touching Alex’s silky skin, her hair and lips. Goose bumps rose quickly all over Alex’s body as they kissed, all tears forgotten.  

It turned out Gertrude was a fierce herding dog, and for some reason, took to Winn immediately. She tried to herd him to everyone’s amusement, particularly Winn’s, who was delighted to be Gertrude’s favourite. It was nice having an apartment large enough to have everyone over. Especially when Jackson showed his talents at the grill. He quickly ingrained himself into the group, almost becoming Kara’s favourite person, the way she loved his barbeque.

On the last barbeque of that summer, Alex and Maggie sat together in one of their conformable terrace chairs, watching as the others mingled and laughed. 

“Can you believe we made it?” Alex asked.

Maggie was silent. Even after all this time, it was hard for her to say whether they had, indeed, _made it_. She just turned a bit in Alex’s arms and kissed her neck.

“You know, when we broke up-,”

“You dumped me, Danvers, and you well know it.”

“When we _broke up_ ,” Alex repeated, unwilling to say it. She kissed Maggie, “at first, I was ok, for months. Went out, had some trysts-,”

“I should tell you about my ex-girlfriends sometime, too,” Maggie elbowed her, interrupting.

“Shush, let me say this,” she squeezed Maggie around the waist, “I convinced myself things would get better, you know? I was ok,” she nodded. “I kinda was, for real. And everyone thought I was just mourning our relationship, but that I just needed to find myself, find someone that would make me happy,” she sighed, “like you can go to the shop and get a new car, or a new fridge.”

“Hmmm.”

“It just got progressively bad, when I realised the mistake I’ve made-, so bad,”

“Alex, that’s in the past, ok? We both made mistakes,” Maggie said firmly, squeezing Alex in her arms.

“I don’t know that you made any mistakes, Maggie,” Alex said after a pause and another kiss. “I love you, you know that, right?”

“I love you, too.”

xxx

Time flew for them, in their little haven, and soon, Maggie and Alex had been living together for almost two years. They often talked about the past, about the hurdles that meant they required a second chance at life to get there. Maggie forever concerned that Alex was giving up on her motherhood dreams to be with her, and Alex reassuring her, time after time. It was healing. They both knew there could be no future without acknowledging the past, the scars they have left on each other. The pain inflicted.

“Gertrude, let go!” Alex said from the kitchen, “I said let go.”

Gertrude barked loudly, and then whined.

“Alex?” Maggie stepped out of the bathroom, concerned. Gertrude was hiding a large wood cutting board from Alex, and Alex was trying to bribe her to step away from it with bacon, hence the whining.

Gertrude wanting _both_ to guard and to get the bacon.

“Alex?” she repeated.

Alex looked at Maggie, “I’m trying to load the dishwasher,” she pointed an accusing finger, “but _your_ dog stole the cutting board.”

“Oh, now she is my dog, is she?” Maggie put her hands on her hips and went to see what Gertrude was protecting so fiercely. “Seriously? You’re going to put that into the dishwasher? How many times have I told you wood _never_ goes into the dishwasher?”

Alex looked chagrined, and admitted, “I forgot.”

She went over to Gertrude, “good girl, Gertrude. Thank god someone in this family has more memory than a fish. It is not Alex, is it, baby?” she talked to the dog, petting her affectionately “good girl.”

“Hey, I resent that,” Alex said petulantly, and as soon as Maggie took the cutting board to the sink, gave Gertrude the bacon, petting her too, “good girl,” she whispered loudly, “you are _my_ girl, but let’s not tell Maggie, she gets jealous.”

“I can hear you, you know.”

Alex went to Maggie, hugging her fiercely around the waist. “This is a first, you know.”

“What is.”

“Us, arguing about how to load the dishwasher.”

Maggie let out a laugh and turned in Alex’s embrace, hugging her too. “It is _not_. You just never listen. There’s clearly a superior way to load a dishwasher, Dr. Dr. Danvers.”

They decided to go for brunch and a walk by the park with Gertrude. By the time they got back to the apartment it was late afternoon, and they decided to just sit on the sofa to watch some TV. Alex eagerly reached for the book she had been reading, but Maggie took it first, putting it away.

“These last couple of years, I’ve been really happy, Alex. With you. And I know that I made you unhappy, before,” she said, “and you didn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth about it.”

Alex started to murmur a protest, but Maggie raised a hand and asked, “are you happy? With me? With this life? Is it enough for you?”

Alex turned to Maggie, reaching for her, “these last two years, Maggie, there are no words to describe how happy I’ve been, how grateful I am to have you. You make me happier than I’ve ever been,” she kissed Maggie, “this life, with you, it’s a gift,” she drew a circle in the air around them, “all my dreams, all of them, are here, with you.”

Maggie kissed her and got up from the sofa, going to get something from a drawer.

“I’ve kept these, for today,” she said as she showed Alex their rings. “They’re new in a way, you know, because we never got married, so they can be both old and new, the past we’ve learned from, and the future we want to have together.”

Alex started to cry as Maggie kneeled down in front of her.

“Alex, I love you. You’re my best friend, the love of my life,” she took a breath, “I want to spend the rest of my days with you,” she reached to grab Alex’s hands. “Will you marry me?”

Alex went down on her knees too, toppling over Maggie and sending them both to the floor in a pile of limbs, “yes,” she said when they finally managed to stop laughing, “yes, I’ll marry you. I love you too, Maggie.”

xxx

It ended up being a small wedding, nothing like the huge production they planned before. Just around twenty people in all. Their best friends and closer family. They rented a beautiful cottage in the mountains, which came with a small ballroom and so Alex insisted they get a band.

It was a wonderful day, full of laugher, drinking and dancing.

By late afternoon, Maggie stumbled into Alex and Jackson, who were sitting on the floor, hiding behind one of the large ornaments that decorated the room.

“What are you doing down there?”

“I’m hiding from your aunt, she’s gone all harus-, haruspex on me!” she took a swing out of a drink that looked about five parts alcohol, one part lemon.

“What?” she looked at Jackson.

Jackson laughed, “your aunt Rosa was talking about going to the kitchen to find some poultry, you know, explaining how to read omens. She was joking,” he scratched his chin, “I think.”

“She has a string of garlic in her purse,” Alex whined.

“She _doesn’t_ ,” Maggie hissed. “Alex, you’re drunk.”

“I am,” she giggled, “and you’re pretty.” She planted a sloppy kiss on Maggie’s lips, “and my wife!” she almost shouted, “I gotta tell Kara about it again,” and with a final kiss she ran over to her sister, who had been trying to convince the band to play One Direction songs all afternoon. Jackson followed right behind, grabbing Winn to join him in the dance floor.

Maggie watched them with a wide smile.

This was _her_ family.

FIN.


End file.
